ANOTHER EMAIL, THE KIND I LOVE, BUT NEVER "FORWARD"

Oh, I came to my work table about 45 minutes ago and opened my email.  There it was, one of my favorite types of email.  I was in just the right mood, so I figured I would have some fun.  It's allowed because after all, the author of the original remains unknown.  
So, do what I do with these things: put yourself in your mental clown suit, put on your red bubble nose, your big floppy shoes, your white gloves and your pointy hat and proceed.  You'll see the symbol of the blank flag a little later.

1. Obama:      Bye                   Relax, he’s gone anyway.

2. Put "GOD" back in America!!!   You think if He were not here that things would be as good as they are?

3. Borders:         Closed!      Good, no more Canadians, Japanese, Indians, Chinese, Italians, Somalis, Nigerians, South Africans, Brazilians, Argentinians, Venezuelans, Cubans, Norwegians, Filipinos…did I miss any?

4. Congress: On the same retirement & healthcare plans as everybody else.  I agree, Medicare for us all.  That way we would all be equally unhappy at the quality of the healthcare in this country.

5. Congress:      Obey its own laws NOW!  That’s one I agree with.  Oh wait - will we enjoy the stock market sweetheart loopholes too?

6. Language:       English only!  Are you ready to pick one?  Make God more important and make the national language Aramaic.

7. Culture: Constitution, and the Bill of Rights!  What does this mean?  Culture?  Constitution?  Bill of rights?  I think we ought to try AGRIculture.  Since this is a bucket list, many of us will be there pushing daisies anyway.

8. Drug Free: Mandatory Drug Screening before & during Welfare! And before voting, and twice a year at random if you are a driver; and if you’re on unemployment; and if you’re on Medicare; and if you’re on social security and finally if you have to drive over 25 miles to work, random testing 4 times a year.                                                                      

 9. NO freebies to Non-Citizens! I agree.  All freebies that used to be rained down upon non-citizens should be distributed equally to all citizens for a once per month distribution.                         

10. Balance the budget.  Against what?  Nobody knows how much money we owe, nor how much money we have, nor how much money is being slid off to the side to foreign shelters, nor how much is being embezzled.        

 11. Stop giving away our money to foreign countries! Charge them for our help! We need it here.

Yeah, we need every penny we can out our hands on == % of GDP in foreign aid?  0.2 %

Campaign contributions and lobby money recipients (you know who they are)  = 0.5%

You’re right, Washington DC is a foreign country.

 12. Fix the TAX CODE!  I agree. Flat tax. NO deductions. No minimum allowance-you pay from the first penny.  ALL income, earned, non-earned, capital gains, EVERYTHING, no matter where it comes from on the globe, 15%.                     

And most of all.

13. "RESPECT OUR MILITARY AND OUR FLAG!!"We the people are coming!  Who cares?

We the people are here and we waste our money by buying politicians, trying to get them to do what we want and need, voting for idiots, liars, tax evaders and a host of other vermin.  So what is meant by “we are coming?”

Needless to say I didn't forward this fun-filled response of mine.